Jason Evert in Manila

Just a quick note. There has been a change of venue for Jason Evert's talk in Manila. Instead of the Araneta Coliseum venue, chastity speaker Jason Evert will conduct a talk at SMX Convention Center entitled Real Love Revolution on February 27, Sunday, from 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. Entrance fee is P50.

Please be guided accordingly. Thanks for visiting our blog. See you this Sunday!

On Purity by St. John Bosco

I am presently reading a booklet I bought at a Catholic bookstore years ago entitled "The Way to Heaven". It deals with the topic of chastity in the life of St. John Bosco, founder of the Salesian order. I am amazed how John Bosco practiced this virtue in his lifetime so as to make him more angelic than human. I want to share some pointers from the book on safeguarding chastity, which according to St. John Bosco is a very delicate virtue that makes men like unto angels. He loved this virtue so much so as to make it the hallmark of his congregation just as much as the Franciscans are well known for the virtue of poverty.

Nine Safeguards for the Holy Virtue of Purity

1. Avoid idleness.

I must admit that I am most vulnerable to succumbing to sexual temptations when I am idle and alone.

2. Shun bad companions.

Unfortunately they are all around us - a vexation to the spirit. You don't have to hang out with these people.

3. Associate with good companions.

These are the people you should make friends with. These are the good guys and fortunate are you to find even just one.

4. Go to confession frequently.

If you can't stomach not taking a bath at least once a day, then give your soul a "spiritual bath" at least once a month - that's how Pope John Paul II defined frequent confession - at least once a month. Of course, you can receive it as often and as frequent as you would like but be sure to make each confession a good one.

5. Receive communion often.

Don't you dare receive the Body and Blood of Our Lord if you're conscious of mortal sin. You must have recourse to Confession first before you can receive communion. Receiving communion in a state of mortal sin is sacrilegious; you'll just end up deeper in the pit.

6. Pray to Mary often.

I won't argue with our Protestant brothers about this, but as Catholics we pray to the Blessed Mother because we venerate her and we know how powerful Her intercession is before God. You cannot afford to ignore Mary in working out your salvation because all graces that come from God is dispensed by Her.

7. Hear Mass devoutly.

Don't be contented with attending masses on Sundays and holy days of obligation. If you have free time during the week, attend an extra mass or better yet attend it daily with as much devotion as you can muster. It's all for your own good. Offer masses for the Poor Souls as well coz one day you might end up as one of them and how you would wish that others pray in your behalf.

8. Make up for past faulty confessions.

So, you're going to confession regularly, but you keep falling into the same sins over and over. Perhaps, you don't have a firm purpose of amendment like me. Well, don't lose heart. Make an effort to make every confession as contrite and sincere as possible, and pray hard for the grace to amend your wrong ways and to overcome your weaknesses.

9. In Mary's honor, make small but frequent acts of self-denial.

Offer it all up to Our Lady and She will help you. You see, self-denial is indispensable if you want to live a chaste life because a life of chastity is a life of renunciation, self-discipline, and yes sacrifice too.

On the Virtue of Chastity:

"Where there is chastity, there too are all the other virtues, because chastity attracts them all. Without chastity, all other virtues are nonexistent. Chastity must be the pivot upon which all our actions revolve...nowadays, sterling modesty and chastity are a must. If you love this virtue which is so delicate, and tender, you will be like angels of God. By cherishing this virtue, you will acquire the holy fear of God and peace of heart.

You will have no further anguish or pangs of conscience, but only a fervor in things which pertain to God's worship and a readiness to suffer anything for His sake. Possessing this virtue, we can be sure we are walking along the right path, even our most insignificant actions will be pleasing to God. We shall thus earn countless merits and be certain of one day attaining our immortal reward, the full possession of God in our heavenly home.

Let us therefore make every effort to shun any thought which may dim this virtue ever so slightly, any glance or touch of ourselves or others, for as I again repeat, all other virtues which we may acquire are dependent on chastity. What will help us most to safeguard it jealously is obedience in all things. These two virtues go hand in hand and one who is perfectly obedient can also be sure of possessing the inestimable treasure of purity.

Let us earnestly implore the Lord for it because if He grants us chastity we shall not need anything else. Simply by keeping chaste we shall obtain every good joy from heaven."

- St. John Bosco

The Importance of a Pure Heart

Forwarded e-mail:

There is some truth to the old bumper-sticker adage, "Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself." We all do a pretty good job of putting ourselves in the way of temptation. While we love to blame it on the devil or on other people, the fact is that we often place ourselves unnecessarily in temptation's way.

Maybe you have felt that if you could somehow remove yourself from all outward enticements, you would never sin again. But that simply isn't true. The problem is within us.

The Bible tells us, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?" (Jeremiah 17:9 NKJV).James wrote, "Temptation comes from the lure of our own evil desires.These evil desires lead to evil actions, and evil actions lead to death"(1:14-15 NLT).
That is what Jesus spoke of in the Sermon on the Mount. He addressed areas of sin that are widespread in our culture today, including lust.

Rather than focusing on externals, Jesus dealt with the heart, saying that if our minds are filled with lustful thoughts, it is as though we have actually committed the deeds themselves. It is still sin before God, and God wants to change our hearts.

Jesus said, " 'You have heard that the law of Moses says, "Do not commit adultery." But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust in his eye has already committed adultery with her in his heart'" (Matthew 5:27-28 NLT).

There are so many things in our culture today that push this sin. We can't escape it. Everywhere we go, there is something--from billboards to television commercials to web site pop-up ads--that feeds the fire of lust.

So here is what it comes down to: we need to do everything we can to stay out of the way of temptation.

For example, if you are watching TV and a scene comes on that you know will only feed lust, here is an idea. There is this thing you hold in your hand called a remote control. Usually, in the upper right or left-hand corner of this object, there is a red button labeled, "power."If you push that button, something miraculous happens: the image goes away. Use that button. Turn the TV off.

If you are in a movie theater and a scene comes up that would encourage lust, instead of thinking, "This is so horrible. Look at that. I can't believe that," get up and walk out of the theater. Better yet, find out what the film is about before you go inside to see it in the first place.

Here is why maintaining a pure heart is so important for believers. If the only thing that is stopping us from committing a certain sin is the fear of getting caught, then when circumstances change in such a way that we feel we can pull it off, we will indeed go and commit that sin.

We need internal incentive, not just outward deterrents. We need a motivationto do the right thing that is based on a fear of displeasing and dishonoring the Lord. We need a motivation that comes from a desire to not sin against God.

The Bible tells us to bring "every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ" (2 Corinthians 10:5 NKJV). Why? Because our thoughts can turn into actions.
It has been said, "Sow a thought; reap an act. Sow an act; reap a habit. Sow a habit; reap a character. Sow a character; reap a destiny.

Each of us needs to periodically look at our lives and say, "Are there any things that I am doing or people that I am spending time around or places that I am going that would encourage lust in my heart and mind?"

Maybe it is something you have been doing, music you have been listening to, movies or television shows you have been watching, or Internet sites you have been visiting that are feeding the fires of lust. These will never satisfy you. They will only make things worse.
Do whatever is necessary and give up what is necessary to keep yourself from falling into sin. Do what you need to do. Take extreme measures, because THE HEART OF THE MATTER IS THE MATTER OF THE HEART. If we can get our hearts changed, then our actions will change as well.

On Lust by St. John Mary Vianney

Our reflection for the week is about lust and here I am featuring St. John Mary Vianney catechism on lust. I pray that we all be touched and inspired by the words of this saint. Let me forewarn the reader though that the saint's approach is very direct and straightforward. This is not for the faint of heart and sensitive. His words of admonition should inspire in the person struggling with this vice repentance and hope. Read on:


Lust is the love of the pleasures that are contrary to purity.

No sins, my children, ruin and destroy a soul so quickly as this shameful sin; it snatches us out of the hands of the good God and hurls us like a stone into an abyss of mire and corruption. Once plunged in this mire, we cannot get out, we make a deeper hole in it every day, we sink lower and lower. Then we lose the faith, we laugh at the truths of religion, we no longer see Heaven, we do not fear Hell. O my children! how much are they to be pitied who give way to this passion! How wretched they are! Their soul, which was so beautiful, which attracted the eyes of the good God, over which He leant as one leans over a perfumed rose, has become like a rotten carcass, of which the pestilential door rises even to His throne. . . .

See, my children! Jesus Christ endured patiently, among His Apostles, men who were proud, ambitious, greedy--even one who betrayed Him; but He could not bear the least stain of impurity in any of them; it is of all vices that which He has most in abhorrence: "My Spirit does not dwell in you," the Lord says, "if you are nothing but flesh and corruption. " God gives up the impure to all the wicked inclinations of his heart. He lets him wallow, like the vile swine, in the mire, and does not even let him smell its offensive exhalations. . . . The immodest man is odious to everyone, and is not aware of it. God has set the mark of ignominy on his forehead, and he is not ashamed; he has a face of brass and a heart of bronze; it is in vain you talk to him of honour, of virtue; he is full of arrogance and pride. The eternal truths, death, judgment, Paradise, Hell-nothing terrifies him, nothing can move him. So, my children, of all sins, that of impurity is the most difficult to eradicate. Other sins forge for us chains of iron, but this one makes them of bull's hide, which can be neither broken nor rent; it is a fire, a furnace, which consumes even to the most advanced old age. See those two infamous old men who attempted the purity of the chaste Susannah; they had kept the fire of their youth even till they were decrepit. When the body is worn out with debauchery, when they can no longer satisfy their passions, they supply the place of it, oh, sham! by infamous desires and memories.

With one foot in the grave, they still speak the language of passion, till their last breath; they die as they have lived, impenitent; for what penance can be done by the impure, what sacrifice can be imposed on himself at his death, who during his life has always given way to his passions? Can one at the last moment expect a good confession, a good Communion, from him who has concealed one of these shameful sins, perhaps, from his earliest youth--who has heaped sacrilege on sacrilege? Will the tongue, which has been silent up to this day, be unloosed at the last moment? No, no, my children; God has abandoned him; many sheets of lead already weigh upon him; he will add another, and it will be the last . . .

Chasing Chastity

The past week has been a great week for me in terms of sobriety. For the whole week, I never indulged in masturbation or watched porn on the internet. I pray it remains this way. The feeling of having total control over my addictions even for just a whole week was "glorious". Now, there is something I can look forward over the coming weeks hopefully. My battle with pornography and masturbation does not end in controlling my urges, neither do I consider this to be the ultimate measure of my own progress towards chastity. There is something more to chastity than being in total control of your passions and for a person with SSA the struggle becomes compounded with an innate attraction towards persons of the same sex. It gets a little complicated here as one tries to integrate a chaste lifestyle and at the same time deals with SSA issues.

The Vocation to Chastity

The Catechism of the Catholic Church defines chastity as a successful integration of sexuality within the person and thus the inner unity of man in his bodily and spiritual being. The virtue of chastity comes under the cardinal virtue of temperance, which seeks to permeate the passions and appetites of the senses with reason. It is a moral virtue, a gift from God, a grace, and a fruit of spiritual effort.

On a more personal level, I have been struggling with chastity issues ever since I was in grade school. Until now it is still one of my biggest struggle. I have addictions to porn and masturbation, although I have made significant progress with how I deal with other people. I haven't had real sex with anybody as far as I can remember for years now, and yet there is still so much work to be done on my part toward reaching chastity. I am yet to learn some lessons in self-mastery and I still need to internalize why I want to be chaste in the first place. I don't want it to be like a useless sacrifice or practice of self-denial that serves no higher purpose. In doing so, I desire to grow in the process and be transformed.


Chastity and Sexual Reorientation

I am going to reveal a very personal view on this issue as I see it. For many people I know who struggle with SSA, majority of them (including me) have some chastity issues and they admit it themselves openly. Many of them also desire to tread the path of sexual reorientation through reparative therapy. I will touch on the subject of reparative therapy in my subsequent posts here. I have nothing against it. It is good and a goal worth seeking. But there is a problem. Those who have gotten themselves into this noble path of sexual orientation are not addressing first the more basic issue, which is consequently a matter of greater importance than sexual reorientation itself, and that basic issue is - CHASTITY. A few things here.

1. Chastity is the greater good.

Sexual reorientation is a complicated process and so does chastity. Both take time and never happen overnight. If one is confronted between a choice of two goods, he must choose the greater good. This is in contrast with choosing between two evils, where one must choose the lesser evil. In this case, chastity is the greater good because it is a moral virtue. Because it is very difficult to undertake two gargantuan tasks at the same time without compromising one or the other, one must choose the task that is of greater and higher importance. Don't you sometimes wonder why Christ included purity of heart as one of the condition to achieve supreme blessedness? Blessed are the pure of heart for they shall see God. We've heard this passage many times haven't we? Note that Christ attached the reward of the Beatific Vision (seeing God) with being pure at heart. If that is so, then that alone justifies the great value of this virtue among other things.

2. You must be chaste first with yourself before you can be chaste with other people.

A chaste person who enters into a relationship has a great safeguard against falling into temptations of impurity. An unchaste person often brings his unchastity into the relationship thus destroying it in the process. I counseled a guy friend of mine who is having an issue with a fellow guy with SSA that it would be more satisfying for him to know the "soul" of that person than it would be to have sex with him. I believe that if both parties are chaste, the relationship will be more fruitful and meaningful because there is mutual respect, and each does not seek what he can get out of the relationship but what he can give into it. This is the perfect relationship for me - a chaste, emotionally mature relationship. I thank my former counselor for this insight.

3. Learn to call a spade a spade.

Frankly, some people use the term "reparative therapy" as a license to justify their sexual behavior. Stop right there. Homosexual acts are acts of grave depravity and are always intrinsically disordered. A homosexual act, like fornication and adultery, is a grave sin, a mortal sin, just in case one does not know. No amount of reasoning can alter this truth and so it is at this point why cultivating the virtue of chastity all the more becomes apparent. Here is where we cross the line, thus making us not any different from those who practice the gay lifestyle outside of a support group.

4. A chaste homosexual is far better off than an unchaste heterosexual.

Between the two I would choose the former - really, for the condition of homosexuality by itself represents only a cross, a heavy one at that, while being unchaste represents a "grave defect" of character. Chastity must become the solid foundation into which a person's desire towards sexual reorientation should be built, and whether one becomes reoriented in the end or not, the virtue of chastity will make a person grow in his personhood - mature and emotionally stable.

Chastity does not mean abstention from sexual wrong; it means something flaming, like Joan of Arc - G.K. Chesterton